Mac's Manic Musings
It's all part of the plan again as we conclude the two-part fictional interview in a humourous way
JOHN MACDONALD
Issue date: 3/9/10 Section: Op/Ed
|
interview with Sir
Cumnavey Gashun, the
designer of the convoluted
Bucks Newtown campus,
we explore the source of
his eccentric design ideas.
Sir Cumnavey, what
inspired you to come up
with such a complicated
design for the ewtown
Campus?
Actually, I built on the pioneering
work of Dr. E.
Lusive of the Heidelberg
Convoluted Design
Institute, where I did my
graduate work. You think
that it was hard to find
your first classes at
Newtown? Try finding the
first class at the Design
Institute.
To graduate we had to get a
grade of C or better in
Navigating Convoluted
Designs, taught by Dr.
Lusive. Finding the classroom
was nearly impossible.
Why does that sound familiar?
The Institute was a hodgepodge
of multi-floor buildings,
some ultra-modern,
others centuries-old and all
vastly different from each
other. The buildings had
been converted from their
former uses to classroom
buildings. They included
two brothels, a factory that
manufactured holes to put
in donuts, and a plant that
unbottled water, failed
businesses all.
There were two other former
factories located on
opposite sides of the campus.
One of them made
deo, and the other made
dorant. Everyone said that
if only they had gotten
together, they would have
enjoyed the sweet smell of
success. There were 23
other buildings, But I
digress.
The information sheet that
we were given only provided
the date and time when
the class was supposed to
begin, nothing else. We
were shocked to find out
that our grade was solely
determined by our ability
to find the class.
The class was only held
once a week. Our grade
was to be reduced five
points for each week that
we couldn't find the class.
They would throw us out
of the program if we didn't
find the class by the sixth
week.
At least here at Bucks, you
can always ask another student
for directions. They
probably don't have any
better idea of they are than
you do but at least you can
ask. At Heidelberg, the
slightest hint that you were
collaborating with another
student and you were dismissed.
Finding that class was the
hardest thing that I have
ever done.
Many Bucks student feel
the same way.
What students experience
here at Newtown is child's
play. Almost 60 percent of